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Terrible Swede the "Earthy" Lutheran Blog vs The Largest Filipino on Earth vs "The Fluffy"
Doctrinal differences are important to the Lutherans because at the root of every false doctrine is the devil, seeking to destroy the Gospel.

Tuesday, August 31, 2004 AD

Something I'm proud of...

...and worth bragging about: I provided FREE alcohol at our wedding reception!

One of many...

...gifts that my wife and I really appreciated from our wedding was Every Day I Will Bless Thee by this Kung Fu Master from this Kung Fu Master at this confessional church.

Happy anniversary...

...to my lovely wife of two years. I thank God for you everyday.

Monday, August 30, 2004 AD

My version...

...of what "happened" is much shorter: Swede meets blonde and dismiss blonde as "ditzy" at University Lutheran Center at Wichita State; Swede takes "ditzy" blonde home to her mother after she gets sick at the regional Lutheran Student Fellowship, with thoughts of "please don't throw up in my truck, please don't throw up in my truck"; Swede takes "ditzy" blonde to German Reformation Banquet at Holy Cross in October 2000; Swede realized blonde is not-so "ditzy" but really "hot"; Swede proposes to "hot" blonde; Swede marries "hot" blonde; Swede realizes this saying is true - "What's hers is hers and what's your's is hers" Dooh!

Disclaimer: I am not as kind, romantic, etc., as my wife would make you believe.

Details (part two)...

...of how the Swedish "Jew" Filipino hooks up with a hot blond is here.

Sunday, August 29, 2004 AD

This one's...

...for my hot blonde wife! The background music of my blog is "Pachelbel Canon in D". It was one our favorite pieces. I'm only doing this for a FEW days.

What the...?

...Christine, Mrs. Swede's friend, said to her, "You should get an award for putting up with The Terrible Swede for as long as you have."

My thoughts...

...on the Divine Service of our marriage. Two things were going through my head: one, I wanted Miss German as my wife (she looked hot! and still does); two, I wanted my parents (non-denominational) to know how much Lutheranism meant to me.

The Divine Service...

Preservice Music
Entrance of Parents
Music: "Cannon in D" by J. Pachelbel
Entrance of Bridesmaids
Music: Jesu, mein Freude by J.S. Bach

Rite of Holy Matrimony

The Procession of the Cross to the Foot of the Chapel
Music: "Trumpet Voluntary" by Jeremiah Clarke

Invocation of the Holy Trinity

P: Beloved in the Lord, we are gathered here ... to begin their marriage in God's name and with his blessing.

Reading of Scripture: Isaiah 61: 10--62:5
Psalmody (see right panel)
Reading of Scripture: Hebrew 13:1-8

Holy Gospel: John 2:1-11

The Sermon
Hymn: "O Perfect Love"

The pastor asks the bridegroom and the bride in turn to declare their intent. Then he asks the parents of the couple to give their consent and blessing.

The pastor leads the couple to the altar for them to speak their vows. He blesses the rings, and the bridegroom and bride exchange rings.

The couple kneels, and the pastor declares the marriage.

Lighting of a Unity Candle
Solo: "Gentle Shepherd"

The pastor prays over the couple and blesses them. The wedding rite concludes with the Lord's Prayer and the Benediction:

C: Our Father, who art in heaven...
P: The peace of God, which passes all understanding... with you always.
C: Amen.

The Recession from the Church
Music: "In Thee Is Gladness" J.S. Bach

PSALMODY (Prayed between Scripture readings)
Congregation speaks lines in bold.

ANTIPHON (Ps. 72:18)
Praise be to the Lord God, the God of Israel,
who alone does marvelous deeds.

SONG TEXT (Song 2:10-14)
My lover spoke and said to me, "Arise, my darling, my beautiful one, and come with me.
See! The winter is past; the rains are over and gone. Flowers appear on the earth.
The season of singing has come;
the cooing of doves is heard in our land.
Arise, come, my darling; my beautiful one, come with me.
My dove in the clefts of the rock, in the hiding places on the mountainside,
Show me your face, let me hear your voice;
for your voice is sweet, and your face lovely.

Glory be to the Father and to the Son and to the Holy Spirit;
as it was in the beginning, is now, and will be forever. Amen.

ANTIPHON (Ps. 72:18)
Praise be to the Lord God, the God of Israel,
who alone does marvelous deeds.

The above holy service is similar to the one in our new Ludderan hymnal, since Pastor Hoger was a part of that committee.

Saturday, August 28, 2004 AD

Details (part one)...

...of how the Swedish "Jew" Filipino hooks up with a hot blond is here.


The wedding of The Terrible Swede and Miss German
August 31, 2002
Immanuel Evangelical Lutheran Church
Wichita, Kansas

Parents of Groom: OLD Mr. & Mrs. Swede
Parents of Bride: OLD Mr. & Mrs. German

Officiant: The Reverand Allen C. Hoger
Organist: Becky S.
Soloist: Ami C.
Crucifer: Sandi G.
Wedding Coordinator: Tressie W.

Best Man: Jason Olson
Maid of Honor: Miss German's sister.
Groomsmen: Dan the Geologist & Tim the Theologian
Bridesmaids: Angie S. & Lori R.

From Martin Luther, 1525...

"This child of man,
this wonderful creature,
has been given to me
by Christ.
May He be praised and glorified."

That quote is what we used on the cover of our wedding program.

My Tangible Peace, My Unspeakable Joy, My Equal...

...wrote this one:

You and me -
Complete opposites
Paired by the Divine intervention
of the one who knows best.

Had to tweak...

...my template to accomodate that blog navigating bar. Blogger couldn't help. Go figure.

Picked this quiz up from her...

Take the What High School
Stereotype Are You?

Friday, August 27, 2004 AD


Mrs. Swede: "You really are a racist, huh, XXXXXX?"
XXXXXX: "Yeah, I guess I am."
Mrs. Swede: "What about The Terrible?"
XXXXXX: "Well, he's Filipino and he was raised in a white family, so he's OK."

What the fuck?

Sunday, August 15, 2004 AD

I've added...

...a shitload of Ludderan links to my blog and my Hot Blonde Wife's blog. Enjoy!


...School starts in four days! Ack! So much to do! Ack!


...so I screwed up in suggesting to the guys AVP. I was deceived! It was totally lame! Not even in the same league as the other Alien or Predator movies. We should have seen Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle and Dan, the Geologist (Strong Kung Fu - can break rocks!) would NOT have these options. (Plot summary so well put by Dan: They get high, they get the munchies, they go to White Castle.) My bad. And for that Dan, the Geologist put me on "Double Secret Probation: Kool Aid" I deserve that one.

What? Am I a Republican? Why did I even bother taken this test?! I guess I’ll back to my George W. Bush fan club and tell them I just wasted 10 minutes of my life. At least I don’t stink, man.

Saturday, August 14, 2004 AD

A V P:

...Whoever wins, we lose. Whatever! What I like about sci-fi: MAN is the real monster. I don't know what to expect with a f_cking PG-13 rating. In Predator, Arnold's character says after the Predator takes his helmet/mask off for some hand-to-hand combat, "You're one ugly motherfucker!" And in Predator 2, Glover's guy says as he removes the helmet/mask of the Predator, "You're one ugly..." And the Predator wakes from feigning, "Motherfucker!" We'll see what this movie holds...

Tuesday, August 10, 2004 AD

When Dan the Geologist

… and I were at last year’s Beer Fest we were given a treat of Sam Adams' Utopia MMII. From the book marker I have:

Strongest Beer Ever Brewed. Hop Varieties – All Four Types Noble hops = Tettnang Tettnanger, Hallertauer Mittelfrueh, Spalt Spalter, Saaz; Malt types and Varieties – Caramel and Vienna Malts = 2-row Harrington, Caramel 60, Munich, 2-row Moravian, Bavarian Smoked; Yeast Strains – 2 Special Proprietary Malts = includes those used in champagne; Flavor Characteristics = Like a fine brandy or cognac, is smooth, but fiery with a clean vanilla maple finish. Deep amber color. Brewed with maple syrup and aged for 6 month in Bourbon, Port, Scotch and Cognac casks; Alcohol by volume = 25%; Original Gravity = 48 Plato, 1.192 specific gravity; Package and Price = 24 oz Decanter, 8500 bottles brewed; $129.99 suggested retail price (for a limited time only)

It tasted very smooth and sweet. I wonder what kind of treats they will have for us this year?

Offering and Full Houses...

From my pastor for full houses (Or here?)…

…Bad excuse for NOT giving an offering – We must buy new shoes for our kids at least once a week! And the mortgage payment, and dance lessons, and the orthodontist, and two college funds. Now if I were single, I could give a lot to church. And if we were both retired with no more child-expenses, we would really be able to help the church. But while we’re right in the middle of raising a family, don’t depend on our offerings! And what if somebody gets laid off?

…Good reason FOR giving an offering – Some people never receive a spouse or else lose one, and many who marry never receive a child. Why are we here – to stay busy and maintain a cash flow? No, we are here as parents to raise our children in the Lord, and be their co-heirs to salvation. That means life spent with our children in the congregation, and as we give we teach them to give. Nothing teaches the need for forgiveness more than being a parent!

From my pastor for new households (we are here)…

…Bad excuse for NOT giving an offering – I’m saving up for the wedding, figuring out where my spouse and I will live – this dive will not do! – and still paying off school bills. And my car is about to give up the ghost. I have every intention of supporting the church regularly once two of us are on our feet and have our budget under control. But not now, please!

…Good reason FOR giving an offering – The changes in my life have been awesome – and wonderful. I always wondered what it would be like, not just to belong to a family, but to start a family. I thank God for this person, and for the future that I know God will bless. From the start, this family will act like part of God’s family, and we will find a way to contribute financially.

From my pastor for single adults (Or here?)…

…Bad excuse for NOT giving an offering – The church is so geared to families, and here I am in my apartment, living as a household of one. I like my church all right, but I consider myself a kind of semi-visitor. If I were more in the stream of things with a family of my own, I’d give more to the offering plate, too.

…Good reason FOR giving an offering – “He settles the lonely in families.” The Psalm describes me and my congregation. My household of one isnt’t typical, maybe, but with no obligations to spouse or kids I am free to help in a way that are very much appreciated. So why should I not also faithfully use my offering envelopes?

From my pastor for college students (Are you here?)…

…Bad excuse for NOT giving an offering – Here I am in a town other than my home, visiting a church that doesn’t know me – if I go at all. I’m still considering the possibility of college as a vacation from church life, so don’t even talk to me about offerings. Books and BEER cost enough. I’m not giving up being Christian, just dropping out of church. (BEER emphasis mine!)

…Good reason FOR giving an offering – Only by God’s mercy have I been given the chance to get a higher education. This is no time to turn my back on life in his church. The more I learn on campus, the more new challenges I face off campus, the more I need Christ and his community. There’s no reason I can’t contribute at least something.

During my wife’s stay…

…at St. Francis, I was able to “catch up” with the world via cable. I found out Snoop Dogg (my second favorite) is 16th of 22 most popular MC and my boy Eminem (my personal favorite!) is 3rd of 22 while “2Pac” takes the cake (that’s 1 of 22 for the non-math majors).

My Tangible Peace, My Unspeakable Joy, My Equal OR the Wisdom and Beauty of Princess Leia (Strong Kung Fu for a girl!) OR Journalistic Jargon OR My Hot Blonde Wife!...

...is getting her splint removed this morning. The people at the Kansas Orthopaedic Center will be removing the staples and stiches as well. But they will leave the pins in her big toe for a few more weeks.

Monday, August 09, 2004 AD

You know...

...Roman Catholic women may have been the author of casserole dishes BUT Lutheran women certainly are the perfector of casserole dishes.

Thank you to all the Lutheran Ladies of Immanuel Evangelical LCMS for providing food to My Tangible Peace, My Unspeakable Joy, My Equal OR the Wisdom and Beauty of Princess Leia (Strong Kung Fu for a girl!) OR Journalistic Jargon OR My Hot Blonde Wife! and me during her surgery recovery.

I love My Tangible Peace, My Unspeakable Joy, My Equal OR the Wisdom and Beauty of Princess Leia (Strong Kung Fu for a girl!) OR Journalistic Jargon OR My Hot Blonde Wife!...

...and she loves me. This morning I was helping her go through her morning routine, I asked her if she was going to watch "13 into 30" with her friend Christine. "It's '13 Going On 30'" was her gentle correction, "It's not a math problem dear Swede." Sh_t, only if they (women) were that easy!

Wednesday, August 04, 2004 AD

Speaking of marriages...

...we have this Canadian friend who loved this Lutheran lady friend of ours so much he wanted to be catechised in what Lutherans believe. Here's what happened - I asked her some simple questions before they got married and before he became a Lutheran: "Will you baptize your kids?" "How are you going to bring up your kids?" "Will you attend the same church?", etc.

...we have a Lutheran friend marry a non-Lutheran friend and now we found out they are going to have a baby. Will they baptize this baby? We hope so. This is the difficulty of interdenominational marriages - they may or may not hold the same values, go to a Lutheran church, etc.

...we found this (ELCA) guy marry a non-Christian woman. What's up with that?

...finally, My Tangible Peace, My Unspeakable Joy, My Equal OR the Wisdom and Beauty of Princess Leia (Strong Kung Fu for a girl!) OR Journalistic Jargon OR My Hot Blonde Wife! and I will be celebrating two years at the end of this month. Nice.

Tuesday, August 03, 2004 AD


...is Lutefisk? It's a nasty smelling fish-dish my Grandfather Olson used to love (RIP). What is Glogg? It is a very good and strong Swedish Lutheran drink. I changed my comments and trackback to these "treats", respectively.

Monday, August 02, 2004 AD

I am proud to introduce...

...Love and Blunder. They are a young Lutheran couple and are about to have a baby! That's awesome - more Lutherans!

Sunday, August 01, 2004 AD


...when My Tangible Peace, My Unspeakable Joy, My Equal OR the Wisdom and Beauty of Princess Leia (Strong Kung Fu for a girl!) OR Journalistic Jargon OR My Hot Blonde Wife! ran her "Edited Copy" blogsite a while back, I helped her with Mary Kay (cult) set up. It turns out that one of you guys and I don't know which one of you contacted her about a beauty concern. Is it you? Or you? My Tangible Peace, My Unspeakable Joy, My Equal OR the Wisdom and Beauty of Princess Leia (Strong Kung Fu for a girl!) OR Journalistic Jargon OR My Hot Blonde Wife! will NOT tell me who it was EVEN when I beg (and I do alot of that! "Can I go to the Big Boy Toy Show?", "Can I go to the Beer Fest?", "Can I hang out with Dan?", etc.). If I ever find out who it was I will totally make fun of you!

Update: My Tangible Peace, My Unspeakable Joy, My Equal OR the Wisdom and Beauty of Princess Leia (Strong Kung Fu for a girl!) OR Journalistic Jargon OR My Hot Blonde Wife! just told me that one of my four guesses was correct. BUT she still won't tell me who!


...the boobies!

WTF? Part 2...

...when I trek back and fourth from home and school, sometimes I listen to NPR. One time they were talking about the queen of chess and they said something really stupid (imagine that): "The queen is the most powerful piece in the game."

No it's not! The king is. It has infinite power, infinite value. You lose the king, you lose the game. You can still win the game if you lose your queen but you lose everything when the king is lost. Dumbasses!